Grit.

Joy.

He’s livin’ his talk!

…from one kid and his one-minute speech:

When growing up, my Mom and I would get matinee tickets for the movie Moonstruck and see it multiple times in a single afternoon. The personalities, the gritty-sweet family, love of opera, the pent up rage, & Italian heritage: the whole story is addictive. And there was the ever alluring test and triumph of love with Cher’s character Loretta.

Should she pursue the safe marriage? …& marry her fiance who she does not love but likes well enough?

Or should she marry her fiance’s brother? …a raging opera-loving fire ball who she loves somethin’ awful? Can she answer a call from her own sense of integrity and pursue an unconventional choice?

After first seeing the movie, Cher’s character Loretta annoyed me.
There were too many expectations she would have to break in order to be with her real love. She would have to break expectation of being betrothed to another. She would have to break expectations of what is generally accepted as ‘right’ and ‘wrong.’ Even with loving the story and the full moons and hilarious romance, it was tough to reconcile Loretta’s crossroads when first seeing Moonstruck play out in my mid teens. When Cher’s Loretta chose to be true to her pining heart and defy expectation in the end, apart of me was happy.

Another part though thought she was too self-entitled. How dare she defy expectations of a commitment like being engaged?

These reflections changed after years of seeing more of the movie (& more of love and loss up close in life). Heck, sometimes love is messy as a hog pen at feed time. Sometimes choosing the unexpected love is the only way to fully live and fully express who we are.

It seems like this is getting into the super-sappy-blog-post-zone. It’s a fun Valentine’s Day reflection…

But Cher and her moonstruck Loretta
…put some recent collaborations in oddly clearer perspective.

In particular, it was with a few different folks preparing for speeches. Each of them (working on separate presentations), wanted to begin their speech by thanking the audience and event hosts. They wanted to be polite and extend gratitude for being invited to present.

They wanted to meet unspoken expectations of being gracious guest speakers. But I invited them to reconsider and show appreciation in other ways.

Life is short (and time with audiences is even shorter).
Thanking the audience is a well meaning gesture; it really is. It also is a familiar if not expected signal to the audience. Countless audiences have heard well meaning speakers launch their talks with ‘thank you.’ So intended or not, when one starts a speech by stating thanks, one immediately wins the perception of being generic. Because the phrase ‘thank you’ and phrases like ‘It’s a privilege to be here’ are what acres and acres of speakers have expressed before.

When opening our next speech, can we all pull a Loretta?
Can we defy expectations? Can we defy those safety phrases of appreciation and begin speeches with authentic expression? Can we show unique appreciation for our audiences by launching immediately into compelling stories and insight with the benefit of our audience at heart? Can we start with our unique purpose, our drive, our expertise, our inspired choices, our clear content arcs, our precise language – and appreciate audiences that way?

Let’s pull a Loretta(!)

Let’s define (plus pursue) our own expectation of what greeting an audience looks like.
Does this sound like a soap box moment?! It’s not meant to; it’s just an exciting thought to imagine all the levels of originality that could draw audiences closer in, beyond “it’s great to be here, thank you.”

What do you think?
What does starting a speech in the spirit of ‘pulling a Loretta’ look like?

Image Full Moon by I Am Marlon, Creative Commons

Two events recently made me reflect on an audience and the impact of public speaking.

One was hearing a keynote address by tech entrepreneur and champion of Twitter Laura Fitton. The other was reading a quote from Gel Conference creator Mark Hurst.

Laura gave the opening keynote address at last year’s Blogworld Expo. She offered plenty of knowledge on Twitter applications and entrepreneurship. But that didn’t drive her speech.

What did:
Her passion for how an online social network made her and many others more connected – and in the end, the world is becoming a less isolated place in her view.

It compelled me to look at social networks in a different way. Her story of authentic enthusiasm came across like a unique ’signature of attitude.’

And then in Seth Godin’s fantastic ebook of insights by thought leaders in business, digital tech, and more – Mark Hurst said:

“People at events are hungry for authenticity. [As a speaker] …you have to build the talk around your passion.”

Sure it’s critical to know the specific audience before you as a speaker – the time requirements, good speech mechanics, stage tech, etc. The goal is not to give generic presentations to every audience. But what Mark conveyed (and what Laura demonstrated) is this:

It’s worth recognizing clearly what exhilarates us as business owners and relate to the audience through that attitude.

Three questions that helped me articulate driving passion in speeches for greater audience impact:

What is your driving motivator?

How can that motivation be described in a story (and then become your signature story that conveys what you believe in most?)?

How can that story relate to what your specific audience requires?

An example comes to mind from a professional photographer who described her workshops recently.

She said: “There’s a lot of technical instruction involved in my workshops. But what I really help my audience understand is how to give the world an archive of beauty!”

That’s her driving passion and I couldn’t wait to help fill her workshop with attendees.

What do you think? What does the passion in your signature speech look like?

Image Do Your Own Thing Pie4Dan, Creative Commons