Quick context about Nov. 9th, an invitation to you, and overall purpose here at LiveYourTalk
At the core here at the blog is talking about speech making and speech craft in general — and how to emerge ourselves into distinct, resonant public speakers….serving our audiences along the way.
This aspect of service is apart of conversation here too — how to use voice (and deed) to help those less fortunate and the organizations that achieve this purpose.
That’s why I support the GiveToTheMax event, a great day of online giving — on November 9th — to raise funds and awards for DC’s regional nonprofits.
On that note: your breakfast invitation
And this is your invitation to join a flash-mob-breakfast-for-fun-fundraising event hosted by my business LiveYourTalk along with the ever good Shana Glickfield, partner of Beekeeper Group.
What inspired this flash-mob-breakfast idea?
In the spirit of Digital Capital Week and the GiveToTheMax fundraising drive — we wanted to plan a coffee and breakfast to enjoy our community, gobble up some good food from a DC institution, and donate whatever we all can to help Miriam’s Kitchen — an area nonprofit which assists thousands of DC’s homeless and less fortunate
Tinu Abayomi-Paul “lives her talk” …regularly speaking-up for the underserved and taking action to attain a greater good.
Thanks to her for this video conversation about Africa and how $5 can overcome “situations of scarcity.”
Tinu is a friend, BlueKey Campaign Champion, and refugee advocate. She has shared great appreciation for the work by USA for UNHCR. And in this video, Tinu shares striking examples of how a few dollars impact living standards in Africa.
Wrestling with Mother’s Day & a renewed perspective
Sometimes Mother’s Day gets me anxious. It feels silly to admit.
But Mom and I have lived apart for years now, with her and Dad in Colorado, with my husband and me in DC. When Mother’s Day rolls around, anxiety has often seeped in my brain. It feels like a pensive, tugging inner voice that says:
“Whatever you do for Mother’s Day, it will fall short. Your mother is THAT fantastic. What gift could possibly honor that enough? And by the way, how can you live so far away from your momma?!”
Darn those inner voices of guilt! Do they ever talk at you too?
But this year, it’s time to re-focus that silly inner guilt. There’s something and someone in particular who helped to re-direct that anxiety to something with greater purpose and uplift. Stacey Monk and her To Mama With Love initiative motivated this re-direction and a great reminder too:
It’s more than celebrating just one mama (that’s my Mama Melba at right!)
This initiative and art project create a unique forum to celebrate our moms. But it’s also a chance to recognize – and support – specific mothers around the world who are impacting their communities for the better.
Folks can both celebrate moms in their lives with “heartspaces” but also help foster the efforts of mothers like “Mama Lucy” Kamptoni. She sold chickens in her Tanzanian village and turned her income into a primary school that now serves over 400 children.
Here’s an excerpt below of a letter written to my mother; the full letter was apart of the heartspace dedicated to her. Thanks to Stacey and the Epic Change team for creating this meaningful place to express mama goodness.
A heartspace excerpt: mom speaks up for self-respect:
But then open house night arrived, as did the chance to meet Mr. Novak directly with you and Dad. And it was then your strength and grit made a distinct impression on all of us. You let Mr. Novak know he was a “sexist pig who had no right to downgrade your daughter or anyone else’s daughter for that matter.”
I was stunned. Dad was grinning and silent.
The force of your words carried a sense of championship. I had never seen a line drawn in the sand like that before. It was the first time I consciously realized the real consequence of that teacher’s treatment. It was unmistakeable and that moment changed my outlook toward gender perceptions and self-respect.
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Happy Mother’s Day(!)
Top image Heart of Palm by Gare & Kitty, Creative Commons
How was your week? Were there ever moments where you craved silence and the chance to intentionally practice being silent?
I appreciate silent meditation although I’m inconsistent in practicing it. I find the benefits of silence have great effect — in creating a sense of calm and clarity of mind.
All this works with a few questions churning in my brain: Can practicing silence and using video effectively unite? And if so, can a meditative impact emerge for those on both ends of the video clip?
Kathy Korman Frey leads a fantastic morning on how women leaders can mentor eachother for measurable results. Data data data is her mantra.
…pic from the session happening now at Sisterhood University pilot workshop. Great, resourceful time here.
Right this very minute, this 200+ crowd chatters in a dimly lit dance hall that’s been organized to host an awesome public speaking event — one that’s awesomely community focused aka IgniteDC.
More on these unique voices and presentations soon!
Welcome! Quick fyi: below was submitted as a guest post to Women Grow Business to publish week of 9/13/10.
A colleague and I recently discussed women’s self-promotion styles compared to men. Then Clay Shirky’s blog post “A Rant About Women” came up and his thought provoking remarks on the subject. His comments also sharpened my own reflections that I had resisted admitting (image Golden Reflection, Creative Commons, by Chad Galloway).
I wish Clay Shirky’s rant from earlier this year contradicted my own observations i.e. that women often threaten their own success by failing to promote themselves effectively or by avoiding that axiom “fake it till you make it.” Clay’s post said this ‘fake it till you make it’ trait is one men seem to exercise with ease and that women would do well to exercise more.
I look forward to when he’ll discuss his rant (and the consequences from it) this week at the WomenWhoTech Telesummit.
Owning up to ‘authenticity 2.0′
Even though my observations of women in many cases, especially those here at Women Grow Business, differ from Shirky’s premise – some of them also resonate. I know for sure I could be more diligent at promoting great women (and men too!), at promoting myself, at going after certain speaker submission goals (quick aside – Susan Mernit shared a great, inclusive speaking calendar that’s tech and business centric).
How are your promotion skills (for self, others)? Honestly I’d like to think my strengths are solid yet I can name plenty of instances when I suppressed self-advocacy to avoid criticism or vulnerability – recently.
A woman thing?
It can be said that avoiding vulnerability is ok and human vs just ‘a woman thing’. But could someone (or their magic wand) just share their magical always-a-confident-elegant-self-promoting-dynamo potion? I’m ready to consume…
This isn’t something that’s savory to admit out loud. But if my self-leadership is to further benefit the life it leads and those impacted by it, then I better own up to this ‘authenticity 2.0′ age we live in and admit Clay Shirky’s rant still hits home.
Be more like men?
As he also admitted toward the end of his rant, he doesn’t know the solution. That makes two of us. Should we women assert self-promotion more like men? Should we teach young women those ‘fake it till you make it’ self-promotion mentalities to better land competitive jobs? Clay Shirky thinks so and as of this writing, I give it a strong maybe.
From the vantage point of preserving authenticity, one part of me resists telling us women to model men’s behavior (image Winds of Change by Kharied, Creative Commons):
“Let our true selves ring free! Self-promote as you will (or not).” …says that inner Joan of Arc. Yet it is matched by an inner devil’s advocate that says: “Girl, you’re kiddin’ yourself. You gotta up your game and promote more like a bandit.”
Do your inner Joans of Arc and devilish advocates wrestle with eachother too? It’s unclear what teachable and generational solutions are to what is a very sensitive appraisal of our gender. There are many nuances, variables, and layers to this topic (in and beyond sexism) that Clay and many others have addressed.
How often does this topic come up in your communities?
What’s your perspective? Do you believe it is an over addressed subject or one that could be discussed more openly?
A summarized approach that’s renewing my commitment to diligently self-promote (with ideally some grace too!):
commit to being one’s best advocate;
assert a ‘public speech 2.0′ mentality in business and personal development. Are the great stories and strengths of your business and your expertise ready for engagement i.e. for stage delivery (a speech), a persuasive conversation (a sales dynamic or job interview), and social networks (your online community)?
seek out strong and compelling forums (that can also be promotional environments) which engage women, like for starters, Women Grow Biz(!) and WomenWhoTech Telesummit. As mentioned Clay takes the rant to the summit on 9/15th. Full disclosure – I’m on WomenWhoTech’s advisory committee but have much respect for the incredible line-up that includes TechCrunch CEO Heather Harde and 30+ other fabulous women in tech and social media.
What’s your approach to consistent habits of promotion (for self and others)?
Are you in the Washington, DC area? If so, please join the local SMC-DC chapter at a meetup 8/25th, as apart of a National Day of Action and fundraising effort for Gulf children’s education.
Are you outside DC or in a different region all together? Perfect! Other cities are participating too next week, complete with jazz, friends, Hurricanes, and great conversation on helping the Gulf recover.
Some reasons why we’re inviting you to participate:
Last month I joined a nonprofit called CitizenEffect for their fact-finding mission trip to the Gulf – or called #CitizenGulf on Twitter. The goal was to learn directly from fishing families about how they’d been impacted by the BP oil spill (and also learn from local nonprofits supporting the Gulf region).
We saw a lot that was both humbling and difficult to observe.
We then continued on to Pensacola, Florida to discuss the oil spill’s impact with locals there and inspect beachfronts. Our team scoped out Casino Beach in particular, pictured below, and its tar balls rolling up on the sand (…my foot in comparison to a tar ball).
Fishing families had just started to rebound from Katrina, then the oil spill emerged…
Would you join DC’s Social Media Club chapter and CitizenEffect to create next steps for Gulf fishing families? It’s all happening on an awesome National Day of Action, Wednesday, August 25th.
Since joining CitizenEffect’s Gulf fact-finding mission trip last month (called #CitizenGulf on Twitter), there are memories of certain stories, small clips of conversations, that keep coming to mind. A few in particular clarify the vulnerable ways many fishing families and Gulf residents find themselves since the oil spill. I haven’t shared them much beyond the fellow bloggers that experienced these stories too during the mission trip. There’s something tender about these specific memories that I think have caused me to shy away from talking more about them. It seems time to be more direct and open now, especially as CitizenEffect’s National Day of Action on August 25th draws near.
Story #1
A local Louisiana resident shared a conversation she had with a priest in St. Bernard’s parish. The priest had been supporting a local community center that distributed meals to fishing families. He realized the confidence and pride many of his parish shared, including one woman in particular. He hadn’t seen this woman for a while and grew concerned on her well being. Recently he saw her approach the food line for a meal. He realized then the level of need she must be facing in light of her pride and resourcefulness he’d observed in her before the oil spill.
Story #2
Another conversation involves a neighborhood where many Vietnamese fishing families live. Many stand in line at a particular community center weekly, supported by Catholic Charities of New Orleans, to collect food vouchers. There were a range of parents and children. And some local center counselors described the impact on family dynamics: children acting out from family tension and fathers, often the head of the fishing businesses, refusing to stand in food stipend lines due to hurt pride about lost means to provide family income.
Story #3
A waitress that we met in Pensacola, Florida, who raised her sons near a neighborhood beach there, said she didn’t know what to tell them (her sons) about how their cherished beach had been affected by the oil spill. She and her sons want to go back to the water but, as the waitress/mom admitted, it’s too toxic. She knows their way of life will change for her family and in her words, she: “…doesn’t want to burden her sons’ spirit by telling them the truth.”
Would you join us August 25th?
These stories are just some of the many reasons that make CitizenEffect’s National Day of Action on August 25th such a compelling event and cause.
Would you join us?
The goal on the 25th is to raise funds for children of Gulf fishing families (and their education) — with CitizenGulf funds going to Catholic Charities of New Orleans who will administer the education program. Do you know of events going on in your area? Do you want to host an event with friends or even join your local Social Media Club chapter for a community meetup – with jazz, Hurricanes, and more — all to help the future of Gulf fishing families?
