Today’s post is available via a 2 minute audio clip; or the written content follows too just below.

Frustration, frustration frustration.

A few colleagues and clients recently shared they were mentally caving to frustration. They were preparing for their next talk and realized: they didn’t know what to say.

They have deep funds of knowledge.

They have specific and creative expertise.

They’ve been speaking to public audiences on and off for years.

They are intelligent, driven people with plenty to offer a range of listeners.

Yet their ideas were stuck, as in really stuck…like an elephant caught in spandex. As in, no idea and no sense of permission were escaping the inner workings of their mind.

The ‘It’s Not Good Enough” syndrome: a common cause of blocked ideas
In each conversation with these great professionals one trait unified each person’s predicament: in every attempt to even casually brainstorm a point of view for their speech — each person immediately criticized themselves. Whatever idea they tossed out as a potential vantage point from which to develop their presentation – it wasn’t good enough to them.

Image Unstuck by MC, Creative Commons

Getting beyond cycles of criticism: a 20 minute exercise to help
Even with heaps of expertise to draw from and share, this often happens — that cycle of ideas/delete/ideas/delete.

This whirlwind of self-criticism builds off itself, making the self-perception of “my ideas aren’t good enough” as the only type of creative development possible.

This is a cycle to break.

For our ideas to progress as public speakers at this type of crossroads, the main goal (stat!) is to create a sense of permission with how we express (and assert) ideas.

Here’s a favorite exercise to get unstuck:

1. Set your timer for 20 minutes.
Your iPhone, Android, or old time tomato timer on the stove. Please grab it and set it for 20 minutes.

2. Commit to zero self-criticism.
Before diving into this exercise, dedicate your mind to a criticism-free zone. Grant full authority to your hand, the pen it is about to hold, and the paper it will write on.

2a. Which leads to: turn off your computer and find paper and a pen.

3. Start the timer.

4. Then write down at least (3) assertions in 20 minutes — one or two sentences each — about your expertise and related to the gist of your speech.
Keep writing until the timer rings.

Judge not, judge not, just write write write. And ideally: consider these assertions as points of view too. As in, write down what you hold true about your industry with your expertise in mind, again in one or two sentences per assertion.

Start each assertion with the words “I believe…” if that helps to dislodge thought.

Raw example:
“I believe public speaking is a self-assertion game and a clarity game…and it takes time to achieve both.”*

*Is that a run-on sentence? Yes. Is it perfect grammar? No. Is it an assertion that I hold true as a public speaking professional? Yes.

Does it satisfy the perimeters of this exercise? You bet.

Because the goal is to get unstuck, out of your mind, away from delete-every-idea-syndrome and onto the page before you.

Another raw example:
“I believe social content is an interactive and strong way to build community online.”
or… “I believe public relations means stimulating social voice around your company.”

How about you?
What tactical ways help you liberate creativity when preparing for a speech (and abandon self-criticism with ideas)?

More ideas you might like:

• 3 ways to prepare an Ignite talk with help from fuzzy bunnies, word counts, and passion;
• How to energize your stage presence with social apps;
• The sobering truth about what an audience remembers by Olivia Mitchell.

The Friday Fiscal Tickle video experiment
A few years ago my husband and I really wanted to get our personal finances together. That commitment led to a renewed interest in world financial news. And at the time, I wondered if online video could make the whole approach to learning such subject matter more playful (and somehow digestible to my learning style). All this brought an informal (SILLY!) video project to life – called the Friday Fiscal Tickle series.

Over months of time, app. 22 mini video cuts shaped the ‘tickle’ series at roughly 90 seconds each. Each clip is a micro digest about global fiscal events where I play around on camera as a news anchor and multiple personalities.

It was an absolute blast.

The goal frankly was to somehow crack myself up with the camera on, to just have fun. I learned a lot. Strangely it was clear these videos were accessible online and public; but back then I don’t believe I fully internalized the fact folks would potentially watch.

Does that make a hill of sense?

Later as my business took shape, I re-allocated time toward that and away from this tickle-video playground. But eventually the series took on a whole new level of developmental impact, beyond the just-having-fun aspect.

What Friday Fiscal Tickle taught as a public speaker and speaker coach — is that loss of self-consciousness is a great, great liberator.

Every blue moon ‘tickle’ video would come to mind. Nice friends or colleagues would ask about it. Or (gulp…) sponsors at events where I’d be speaking would mention: “Hey that tickle series is fun.”

Then the mental games would begin in my head. And questions like these would swirl around in self-doubt:

-Is Fiscal Tickle video too goofy?

-Does the series send the absolute wrong image to prospects, partners, or heck – Mom and Dad?

Then the moment-of-clarity struck and this realization suppressed all other doubt:

“Holy Smokes, how liberating! Those videos were a blast. They were fun. And somehow, the fact that others were allowed to observe the goofiness was not a concern. Those cuts created a chance to not be so self-conscious, to storyboard concepts, to play, to create, to deliver.”

Is that not a vision of confidence for a pubic speaker?
…it is at least for this speaker and coach at this end of the netz.

It was a liberating realization!

So to celebrate this re-commitment to fun self expression, a Friday Fiscal Tickle episode will be re-published here at Live Your Talk intermittently.

What do you think?

What project or topic is so fun and stimulating that your paranoid sense of self slips away….and authentic expression takes over?

Many of the faces in this TV show promo strike me this way – they exude energy without externalizing thought or words:

I’m reading Tony Barr’s Acting for the Camera where he covers how acting has changed since the silent film era; he gets into specific scene work and how actors should perceive stimulus.

What’s been fascinating are his perceptions about energy and actors.

A favorite quote in his book:
“I believe energy is a direct result of how much an actor cares about what is happening (in a scene). If the content is important enough to you – if what is happening in your performance life is important enough – you as an actor will be listening with sufficient intensity to create the necessary energy in the scene.” ~Tony Barr in Acting for the Camera

This expression of energy and ‘listening as caring’ bring the hopes of many public speakers to mind as well, myself included.

How can delivery of a particular presentation be authentically expressed and energized – with both articulated and unexpressed cues?

How can we as public speakers convey a sense of care – a sense of attentiveness – to the audience?

Tony Barr’s philosophy about energy and intentional care for what is happening in scenes address these answers too in my view. It’s a highly engaging, specific resource and I’m enjoying the crossover of relevance as a speaker coach.

How does this quote strike you?

Hello!: Want today’s post via audio cast instead? Just click the embedded player immediately following or read on for the written post.

One thing struck hard and lingered on my mind from last week’s IgniteDC event. And that is: few things resonate with an audience like a story that’s difficult to tell.
That’s not to say at all that the easy story lines aren’t effective or don’t appeal with those listening.

Difficult stories provide emotional scope and depth that often forges trust.
For instance, telling an audience about your daughter’s favorite purple dress relates on a lighter level than a more emotionally expanded scope. That may seem so obvious yet at the same time, when it comes to crafting a speech, emotional clarity and honesty can be game changers. As in – a more resonant emotional reach could come from sharing a story of, say, how for seven months last year your family could only afford two new dresses for your 10 year-old because money was that tight.

Certainly selecting stories and anecdotes depends on what the audience craves (and which parts of your experience can meet that craving). Yet achieving the audience’s needs still involves a human exchange.

Emotional honesty is core to our human infrastructure. And within that premise, sharing what’s hard to emotionally disclose often more freely creates allegiance between a speaker and audience.

Facing educational failure, death, and psychological trauma.
That was the range of subjects which made up last week’s IgniteDC lineup; at times the speakers’ vulnerability was palpabile. That emotional openness drew us all in as we identified with the scary ground the speakers had walked. It was the most compelling night as a whole of content for an IgniteDC (there have been five other programs hosted before this one).

3 other byproducts of telling vulnerable or difficult stories:

1. It makes your uniqueness clear as a speaker (especially with a speaker slate where numerous will present).

2. It provides context and contrast to the arc of your speech. That contrast is a natural mechanism for capturing the audience’s attention.

3. It creates common ground between you and the audience (haven’t we all felt emotionally raw or like failures or angst-ridden?).

Not every speaking opportunity is naturally conducive to the stories you may want to impart. What the audience desires to learn is paramount. Delivering to them also means observing their emotional state in general (so certain venues may not be the place to disclose a life threatening illness, as example).

Yet if there’s a chance to authentically increase emotional resonance, an audience will most always appreciate your honest risk.

More from Live Your Talk’s blog:

• How women can be more persuasive speakers (plus speaking tips galore);
• Increase sense of command through silence when speaking in public – with a wonderful, unique perspective added by Shonali Burke at Waxing Unlyrical;
• Sponsoring IgniteDC and last week’s fantastic lineup.

Image Difficult or Kempville by Brent Moore, Creative Commons.

It’s almost Valentine’s Day and images are everywhere reminding us to care.

In that spirit, have you ever seen a public speaker who came across like they just didn’t care?

I did recently at a conference. And their indifference was like receiving toothpicks for Valentines — it was technically still a gift of function but without making the recipient (or audience) feel special in the process!

At that recent event, the speaker – a business owner in a room full of business owners – said when advancing their slides:

“Oh this set of slides is meant for a different talk. I guess I forgot to change these.” At that point, another conference’s logo (not the logo representing our event) glared on the overhead screen. Without apology, the speaker continued.

This experience was a lost opportunity for audience and speaker alike. Every public speech is a chance to give value, forge trust, and build brand credibility with the audience.

Steps to recover trust that this speaker could’ve taken:

1. Show ownership and a solution quickly
A simple apology gains tons of ground! In this case, the correct slides could’ve been made available later via email or Slideshare. Neither occurred.

2. Offer a gift
Extend a discount on services or sneak peek on upcoming product launches. That’s not to suggest giving ‘away the farm’ just because of a presentation error. But it’s a tangible way to show value for that particular audience.

3. Welcome honest feedback
Convey value for the audience’s opinion and insight even if it means eating humble pie, with this statement as example: “Thanks for your time today and hanging in there when I messed up. I’m committed to improving value so I hope you’ll relay feedback on the event evaluation.”

4. Invite ongoing conversation after the event
The speaker-audience experience is a relational dynamic with all sorts of potential for leads, partnerships, and even community. The speaker could’ve shown their interest by offering to engage post-event through LinkedIn, Twitter, or other networks.

What do you think? Have you been in a similar situation? How else could this presenter have shown they valued the audience after the slide mistake?

Image Healing by Wolf Soul, Creative Commons