It was a fantastic evening last night where I presented on favorite tips and mindsets for preparing persuasive speeches. This was my first time to present to a great membership forum here in Washington, DC — the Fabulous Women Biz Owners founded by Sarah Massey.
This was such a rejuvenating night — great, tenacious folks.
Here’s 13 minutes from my talk that includes:
a 4-prong approach to preparing persuasive presentations plus using vocal flexibility and understanding the impact of silence.
I co-hosted the workshop with the fantastic Jessica Solomon, founder of Spark Creativity. She led a segment on creating an authentic elevator pitch (or what she calls ‘cocktail line’) with some really reflective, thought provoking recommendations.
Hello!
Want today’s post via audio cast instead? Just click the embedded player immediately following or read on for the written post.
When growing up, my Mom and I would get matinee tickets for the movie Moonstruck and see it multiple times in a single afternoon. The personalities, the gritty-sweet family, love of opera, the pent up rage, & Italian heritage: the whole story is addictive. And there was the ever alluring test and triumph of love with Cher’s character Loretta.
Should she pursue the safe marriage? …& marry her fiance who she does not love but likes well enough?
Or should she marry her fiance’s brother? …a raging opera-loving fire ball who she loves somethin’ awful? Can she answer a call from her own sense of integrity and pursue an unconventional choice?
After first seeing the movie, Cher’s character Loretta annoyed me.
There were too many expectations she would have to break in order to be with her real love. She would have to break expectation of being betrothed to another. She would have to break expectations of what is generally accepted as ‘right’ and ‘wrong.’ Even with loving the story and the full moons and hilarious romance, it was tough to reconcile Loretta’s crossroads when first seeing Moonstruck play out in my mid teens. When Cher’s Loretta chose to be true to her pining heart and defy expectation in the end, apart of me was happy.
Another part though thought she was too self-entitled. How dare she defy expectations of a commitment like being engaged?
These reflections changed after years of seeing more of the movie (& more of love and loss up close in life). Heck, sometimes love is messy as a hog pen at feed time. Sometimes choosing the unexpected love is the only way to fully live and fully express who we are.
It seems like this is getting into the super-sappy-blog-post-zone. It’s a fun Valentine’s Day reflection…
But Cher and her moonstruck Loretta
…put some recent collaborations in oddly clearer perspective.
In particular, it was with a few different folks preparing for speeches. Each of them (working on separate presentations), wanted to begin their speech by thanking the audience and event hosts. They wanted to be polite and extend gratitude for being invited to present.
They wanted to meet unspoken expectations of being gracious guest speakers. But I invited them to reconsider and show appreciation in other ways.
Life is short (and time with audiences is even shorter).
Thanking the audience is a well meaning gesture; it really is. It also is a familiar if not expected signal to the audience. Countless audiences have heard well meaning speakers launch their talks with ‘thank you.’ So intended or not, when one starts a speech by stating thanks, one immediately wins the perception of being generic. Because the phrase ‘thank you’ and phrases like ‘It’s a privilege to be here’ are what acres and acres of speakers have expressed before.
When opening our next speech, can we all pull a Loretta?
Can we defy expectations? Can we defy those safety phrases of appreciation and begin speeches with authentic expression? Can we show unique appreciation for our audiences by launching immediately into compelling stories and insight with the benefit of our audience at heart? Can we start with our unique purpose, our drive, our expertise, our inspired choices, our clear content arcs, our precise language – and appreciate audiences that way?
Let’s pull a Loretta(!)
Let’s define (plus pursue) our own expectation of what greeting an audience looks like.
Does this sound like a soap box moment?! It’s not meant to; it’s just an exciting thought to imagine all the levels of originality that could draw audiences closer in, beyond “it’s great to be here, thank you.”
What do you think?
What does starting a speech in the spirit of ‘pulling a Loretta’ look like?
Hello!: Want today’s post via audio cast instead? Just click the embedded player immediately following or read on for the written post.
One thing struck hard and lingered on my mind from last week’s IgniteDC event. And that is: few things resonate with an audience like a story that’s difficult to tell.
That’s not to say at all that the easy story lines aren’t effective or don’t appeal with those listening.
Difficult stories provide emotional scope and depth that often forges trust.
For instance, telling an audience about your daughter’s favorite purple dress relates on a lighter level than a more emotionally expanded scope. That may seem so obvious yet at the same time, when it comes to crafting a speech, emotional clarity and honesty can be game changers. As in – a more resonant emotional reach could come from sharing a story of, say, how for seven months last year your family could only afford two new dresses for your 10 year-old because money was that tight.
Certainly selecting stories and anecdotes depends on what the audience craves (and which parts of your experience can meet that craving). Yet achieving the audience’s needs still involves a human exchange.
Emotional honesty is core to our human infrastructure. And within that premise, sharing what’s hard to emotionally disclose often more freely creates allegiance between a speaker and audience.
Facing educational failure, death, and psychological trauma.
That was the range of subjects which made up last week’s IgniteDC lineup; at times the speakers’ vulnerability was palpabile. That emotional openness drew us all in as we identified with the scary ground the speakers had walked. It was the most compelling night as a whole of content for an IgniteDC (there have been five other programs hosted before this one).
3 other byproducts of telling vulnerable or difficult stories:
1. It makes your uniqueness clear as a speaker (especially with a speaker slate where numerous will present).
2. It provides context and contrast to the arc of your speech. That contrast is a natural mechanism for capturing the audience’s attention.
3. It creates common ground between you and the audience (haven’t we all felt emotionally raw or like failures or angst-ridden?).
Not every speaking opportunity is naturally conducive to the stories you may want to impart. What the audience desires to learn is paramount. Delivering to them also means observing their emotional state in general (so certain venues may not be the place to disclose a life threatening illness, as example).
Yet if there’s a chance to authentically increase emotional resonance, an audience will most always appreciate your honest risk.
What the heck is an IgniteDC event? And why is it so snazzy?
a 15 second story: Live Your Talk is a grateful sponsor of this fun night and here’s a 15 second audio story below about Ignite’s energy and great mission – warning: there’s some vocal playfulness involved…
