“It’s up to you to negotiate.”
Posted: September 28th, 2010 | Author: jillfoster | Filed under: Public speaking, Women entrepreneurs | Tags: leadership, negotiation, persuasive speaking, Selena Rezvani, women in leadership | 2 Comments »Fascinating.
I’m blogging now from a Johns Hopkins University book talk on women leaders building their influence for “Women at the Top.” The author Selena Rezvani and the audience are engaging well with the current conversation centered on learning to negotiate.
How do you persuade in one on one discussions? How do you make the ask in sales, in salary requests? How do you negotiate an angry group or audience (…a question that just came to mind). Really enjoying this.
Sounds like it was a great evening, Jill. Re: persuasion, my instinctive response is to listen and show the other(s) that you’re listening and hear their point of view without saying why their option won’t work.
Ask questions about “how” it will work and help them figure out that process. If you’ve already thought it through, I think it’s more successful for them to actually realize the pros/cons for themselves, and that might be a better way to bring them around to your point of view.
This has worked for me the times I’ve been able to successfully implement it (not often enough!).
I know many people who are so smart, they’ve thought the argument through and both ways till Sunday in advance. But not everyone does that and having someone immediately dismiss your idea can be off-putting (which is bad in the long run, even if you win the immediate “battle”).
Great call Shonali on engaging more through strong listening and asking questions. What you’ve described also sounds like a reliable route toward building trust within a leadership dynamic too. Is long term respect and allegiance useful? I vote yes and it’s a question prompted by your insight to long term vs short term interests — in the face of persuading others toward one’s point of view.