Our human voices are riveting sources of sound.
What is it about the human voice that can capture attention and create allure like no other sound out there? It can express and evoke any type of mood or energy, a demand for attention, certitude, warmth — and at times, all that in a single conversation. Our voice, its tonal flexibility, and good ole inflection powers are addictive.
Image Orange Mood by Pensiero, Creative Commons
The voice and influencing conversations
The inherent enchantment of our voice can often be one of those traits that go unnoticed by ourselves. So the ability to assert conversational impact has a decent chance to being underused.
What could elevate awareness of how the voice can influence what we communicate?
3 scenarios to ensure the voice resonates intended impact
Often I observe people (many are women) who have striking funds of knowledge and career achievement, yet in conversation (one-on-one or sometimes in public speech dynamics) – the ending tone of their voice communicates uncertainty. It sounds like a question is being asked – where that ending vocal note increases half an octave. Yet they are actually making an emphatic statement – not a query. This vocal practice or ‘uptalk’ can be perceived as neediness vs confidence in one’s own credibility.
How to fix it:
Is this something your voice exercises? If unsure, ask trusted listeners or audience members if this trait is apart of your conversational style. If so, practice making your voice a consistent tone by recording your voice via a smart phone audio device. Consciously focus attention on being present-minded when presenting; exert continuity of tone -or- decrease vocal tone to convey a more authoritative tenor.
Have bosses or colleagues suggested after meetings (or live audiences after public speeches) that you could sound more authoritative? Years ago, I received such feedback and it’s an odd, vulnerable thing to hear.
How to fix it:
Learning how to exert your voice’s inherent flexibility is a great source of conversational leadership.
Maintaining authenticity is certainly critical when projecting the voice; the goal is not to mutate into a different communications style and as example, start screaming at your audience.
Image The Scream by NickeStamp, Creative Commons
But gaining confidence in what your own booming voice sounds like can be a big game changer. Can you practice speaking from the diaphragm in an informal setting (or alone)? Can you role play with a trusted peer and practice this vocal assertion when stating professional opinions or presenting data or expressing a minority viewpoint? Record the different range and strength you can achieve with your voice.
A colleague and client recently admitted they often rush through enunciation when delivering public speeches, to the point key message and tone are often glossed over. She’s concerned about recent audience feedback and her perceived confidence.
How to fix it:
Rehearse your opening remarks yet in between each sentence – stop, inhale a deep, deep breath, exhale – then continue rehearsal of opening remarks. There’s another favorite exercise that may be morsels for another post. Yet what this initial practice puts into motion is a conscious cycle of exertion between enunciation, pause points, and breathing. It’s a method to remind the brain of its ability to manage conversational energy and thus, pace.
What’s your opinion?
What public speakers, presenters, radio hosts, or stage actors grip you when they speak?
How do they change or project their voice to make an impact (and what type of impact do they produce – more persuasive, emotive, alluring, assertive, or what else?)?
After hours of strong, resourceful, on-fire conversations – by the end of the day not even the sky could stop the momentum of ideas at this year’s WomenWhoTech Telesummit.
Image Orange Sky by Nick Humphries, Creative Commons.
Holy Awesome Event Batman…and some recaps
Last Wednesday, Allyson Kapin hosted the third annual WomenWhoTech Telesummit that left hundreds of women leaders, technologists, and business professionals enlightened worldwide. Fantastic and deep recaps of the experience now fill the blogosphere with as example: Liminal States and the ever insightful and inclusive view from Jon Pincus ) and Sue Anne Reed’s key takeways, plus Shellie Holubek’s own standouts and content suggestions for next year. Techcrunch CEO Heather Harde plus Tara Hunt, Cathy Brooks, Shireen Mitchell, and 20+ other awesome presenters joined the speaker slate and knocked all our conversational socks off.
Tips: taking on perfectionism, public speaking, and the pitch
Lightening talks launched #WWT this time i.e. four, 10 to 20 minute consecutive conversations. I was ecstatic to co-present the day’s opening discussion with Allyson: tools for public speaking in our Web 2.0 environment.
…with a debrief:
2 tips to transcend that public speech perfectionism
Does waiting for the perfect fund of knowledge derail your assertion to speak in public? Some ideas to assert this:
The goal: Gain confidence in and awareness for your public conversation ability.
The goal: Strengthen flexibility in your impromptu engagement style. Develop the ability to own it publicly when an answer is unknown and continue to lead the audience dynamic despite this.
5 tips for pitching to speaker selection committees
The goal: Execute a strategic approach to public speaking. Make your skill and champion topics visibly accessible for pitch decision makers.
2 tips on mental fortitude and public speech
There were added suggestions and recaps in the above cited event posts too.
What an energizing exchange and day.
What do you think?
What would you add?
Welcome! Quick fyi: below was submitted as a guest post to Women Grow Business to publish week of 9/13/10.
A colleague and I recently discussed women’s self-promotion styles compared to men. Then Clay Shirky’s blog post “A Rant About Women” came up and his thought provoking remarks on the subject. His comments also sharpened my own reflections that I had resisted admitting (image Golden Reflection, Creative Commons, by Chad Galloway).
I wish Clay Shirky’s rant from earlier this year contradicted my own observations i.e. that women often threaten their own success by failing to promote themselves effectively or by avoiding that axiom “fake it till you make it.” Clay’s post said this ‘fake it till you make it’ trait is one men seem to exercise with ease and that women would do well to exercise more.
I look forward to when he’ll discuss his rant (and the consequences from it) this week at the WomenWhoTech Telesummit.
Owning up to ‘authenticity 2.0′
Even though my observations of women in many cases, especially those here at Women Grow Business, differ from Shirky’s premise – some of them also resonate. I know for sure I could be more diligent at promoting great women (and men too!), at promoting myself, at going after certain speaker submission goals (quick aside – Susan Mernit shared a great, inclusive speaking calendar that’s tech and business centric).
How are your promotion skills (for self, others)? Honestly I’d like to think my strengths are solid yet I can name plenty of instances when I suppressed self-advocacy to avoid criticism or vulnerability – recently.
A woman thing?
It can be said that avoiding vulnerability is ok and human vs just ‘a woman thing’. But could someone (or their magic wand) just share their magical always-a-confident-elegant-self-promoting-dynamo potion? I’m ready to consume…
This isn’t something that’s savory to admit out loud. But if my self-leadership is to further benefit the life it leads and those impacted by it, then I better own up to this ‘authenticity 2.0′ age we live in and admit Clay Shirky’s rant still hits home.
Be more like men?
As he also admitted toward the end of his rant, he doesn’t know the solution. That makes two of us. Should we women assert self-promotion more like men? Should we teach young women those ‘fake it till you make it’ self-promotion mentalities to better land competitive jobs? Clay Shirky thinks so and as of this writing, I give it a strong maybe.
From the vantage point of preserving authenticity, one part of me resists telling us women to model men’s behavior (image Winds of Change by Kharied, Creative Commons):
“Let our true selves ring free! Self-promote as you will (or not).” …says that inner Joan of Arc. Yet it is matched by an inner devil’s advocate that says: “Girl, you’re kiddin’ yourself. You gotta up your game and promote more like a bandit.”
Do your inner Joans of Arc and devilish advocates wrestle with eachother too? It’s unclear what teachable and generational solutions are to what is a very sensitive appraisal of our gender. There are many nuances, variables, and layers to this topic (in and beyond sexism) that Clay and many others have addressed.
How often does this topic come up in your communities?
What’s your perspective? Do you believe it is an over addressed subject or one that could be discussed more openly?
A summarized approach that’s renewing my commitment to diligently self-promote (with ideally some grace too!):
What’s your approach to consistent habits of promotion (for self and others)?
This recently was first published as a guest post to Sisarina’s Start a Biz series.
A client and business owner recently made a comment (and I admired her honesty).
She said:
“I don’t like live audiences. I want to use social media to find prospects.”
Our discussion at hand concerned her engagement strategy i.e. the relevant, public conversations and stories that could help carve out trusted, profitable relationships. We were approaching this conversation from two angles for her company: public speaking and social media.
Realizing the online-offline connection
Even though her customer base (current and prospective) heavily engaged offline as well as online, she wanted to prioritize an online approach – and exclude public speech planning since live audiences “dismantled her confidence.”
At this point, the WomenWhoTech Telesummit came to mind – a great event on 9/15th (for disclosure, I’m on the advisory board). I mentioned the summit to her for potential motivation – since many of the speakers work online, relate to my client’s industry, yet also benefit from relating a lot to public speech audiences.
Out of concern, I then said:
“In today’s environment, an audience always exists. And potential customers could be ready for your offering whether they’re online or offline or both. So does any potential customer deserve your confidence, or just those you find online through social media?”
We just looked at eachother for a few seconds.
Her vulnerable feelings about public speech warranted respect. I anxiously wondered silently if my reply was too harsh or insensitive. Certainly fear and that I’m-going-to-vomit anxiety are hard to manage when speaking in public! But it was her complete evasion of potential audiences in this forum – and thus potential customers – that inspired my concern.
It seems reasonable to say we’ve arrived at a ‘public speech 2.0′ reality
-where the engagement arena for our services and brands go beyond any single online or offline dynamic. The client eventually broke the silence and we began brainstorming how a public speech plan could fit into her overall engagement strategy.
These questions have shaped public speech strategy for my own business; and my client used them in her own development and commitment to ‘public speech 2.0′:
What do you think about ‘public speech 2.0′?
What has helped you prepare to authentically, intentionally engage in public, whether that be through social media or a public speech onstage?
Photo by Geoff Livingston, Creative Commons
Advisory Board Member 2012
